Ow ow ow ow ow

My likes and dislikes about the gym:

Dislike: The fact that everything hurts. Strange muscles I didn't even know I had. I can't walk across the room without raising a litany of four-letter words. The outside of my feet hurt. How is that even possible?

Like: The pain means its working. And it recedes enough after 24 hours that I'm ready to go again.

Dislike: That it took me four bloody months to go. Four months, and a new anti-anxiety medication.

Like: But I went! Three days in a row! And I love it! And that fact makes me feel courageous and healthy and strong and powerful and awesome and productive and other positive adjectives!

Dislike: I don't know what to do with the fancy machines there.

Like: The wellness minister at school will tell me what to do with them, as soon as she reads my email. Also, I get a free physical training session once my free trial week runs out and I actually start paying them.

Dislike: There are too many people there.

Like: I manage to go anyway, defeating my hangups about being around that many people at one time.

Dislike: I am surrounded by good looking people, and I know I am not one of them. I am fat and sweaty and gross.

Like: Except, for some reason, I don't feel fat and sweaty and gross when I'm at the gym. I feel awesome. And kind of hot. And I have to admit, it's nice to walk on the treadmill for a while and have some nice things to look at. And think, gee, I'm also pretty attractive. And certainly not the fattest person there, not by far. And that makes me feel good too. Which is perhaps not very nice, comparing yourself to others to make yourself feel good, but bleh on you.

Dislike: Changing in the locker room is a more uncomfortable experience than if I were to preach naked.

Like: The way I smell when I'm all sweaty more than makes up for it. Why is something so gross so nice? I smell like a boy, which is a nice change of pace. Heh. Also, I get to go home and take a shower, and the hot water is relaxing at the end of a stressful day. And then I curl up in bed and my cat curls up next to me and it's just a nice way to finish off the day.

God, what happened to me? I'm all happy and stuff. This is March, and I'm supposed to be depressed. But I'm not. Yippee, I think I like the gym. I don't know how that's even possible, but it's true. I've spent a whole hour on the treadmill for three days in a row. Last night, I walked four whole miles, and burned 600 calories. Which makes a total of 11 miles altogether. And I can't wait to go back.

YESI'MAWESOME!

Afternoon strolls

I went for a few walks this weekend. Let's count it as 15 minutes on both Friday and Saturday. I haven't been to the gym yet this weekend... maybe next week ;)